Saturday, June 9, 2012

Thoughts From The Past

My 32 word long title of a ranting after the worst and hardest break up of my life...
Lust shone bright in my eyes,
But I was blinded by love,
Sadly, though, the equation wasn't right,
The math didn't add up,
And soon enough tragedy struck.
I fell to my knees,
Shattered like a mirror into thousands of pieces,
Cold, numb and unable to breathe,
What is happening?
What is becoming of me?
Then there was pain,
A pain so piercing I began clawing at my chest to extinguish the cause,
That's when I heard the pain called by name.
The name was repeated over and over again,
Each time was as breath taking as watching swords thrust into a box with the magician inside.
Only my breath escaped me from the pain of feeling those swords go deep inside my chest,
My heart...
For only a moment I let down my guard,
And withing seconds my world was savagely ripped apart.
I sat baffled in a daze.
All the memories passed before my eyes and became a haze.
I was played like an instrument,
Paraded around like a show animal,
And strung like a puppet,
Following the puppeteer's lead,
Under control and will of the master.
"This is quite a disaster..."
As the time went by,
Something was decaying inside,
Until one day it finally withered away and died,
I became consumed with rage,
With hate.
I stood up from my knees,
Defying the gravity of misery with a new found strength. I was once again able to stand with a grin, mocking her, eager to touch the lips of vengeance and taste festering revenge and the blooming ego flowering into sweet pride. Seeing the same pain in her eyes as the feeble attempts of making jealousy arouse in me failed kept my head held high. She could no longer hurt me, I'm cold and made of cast iron inside, glowing red on the out, and now I could hurt her more easily than she did me.
My anger and hatred had escaped their cage,
Fused together to make one uncontrollable rage,
Which flared about for months at the mention of her name,
Or any memory that dared resurface.
The dark beast brewing inside, howling, growling, had been set free,
Loose to prowl,
A monster was born,
And that monster was me.

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